Breaking the Monotony
by Ran-san
Summary: It's a few days before Ranma's 17th birthday, and his life has become a boring rut. So, when his friends and enemies, including Akane, mysteriously vanish, Ranma looks foreward to a new challenge. But, WHO is this Doctor person and why is he involved?
1. Prologue

**Breaking the Monotony  
A Doctor Who/Ranma ½ Crossover  
by Ran-san (Randy McCullick)**

**(Disclaimer)**

The idea for this fanfic was spawned by me reading my old "Ranma ½" manga while the new "Doctor Who" series was premiering on the Sci-Fi Channel. The resulting dream that night became the basis for this work.

Ranma, Akane, and the rest of the Nerima crew are the intellectual property of Rumiko Takahashi, whose shoes this humble one is unworthy to lick.

The Doctor and the Tardis are the property of the British Broadcasting Company (BBC), and currently under the control of BBC Wales and Russell T. Davies.

This work of fiction takes place a few weeks following the end of Volume 38 of the "Ranma ½" Manga, and in the future of the current "Doctor Who" universe. All events in both the Ranma ½ Manga and anime are considered to have occurred, with the Manga taking priority over the anime where events overlap.

**Prologue**

Somewhere in the depths of space/time, a box traveled through the void. Inside the impossibly large control room, man stood next to a central console, looking like he was doing his best to fight off a dismal depression…and not quite succeeding.

_That's another one come and gone, _The man called The Doctor thought to himself.

This had been one of his happier good-byes, true. His young companion, Deborah, had fallen in love with a man on Artemian, where they had had their last, and now final adventure. The Doctor for once had managed to stick around for the wedding. He was still wearing his Tuxedo. Next to him, on the console, was a half-eaten piece of wedding cake. He had snuck out and left during the reception. He hated good-byes.

_Still, there were worse good-byes,_ he thought, trying to cheer himself up. _Good-byes like Sara's, like Adric's, like Rose's. _That thought had sprung up unbidden, and now he was even glummer. And now, he was alone again. The same old life. The last of his people, without a home planet, traveling hither-thither throughout the universe. Taking in the wonders, and not a friend in the universe to share it with.

A universe that seemed not to be able to get along without him.

_You're getting old, Doctor, _he chided himself. _You can't keep this up forever. Someday you'll need an apprentice._

He shook his head at the insane thought, and continued steering his ship though the cosmos.

After all….who would deliberately spend their life in a constant life-or-death struggle with the forces of evil that had become a daily routine to him for centuries?

* * *

In Nerima, Japan, a teenaged black-haired pigtailed boy sneezed in his sleep, waking him. After a reflective moment, he rolled over, but not before kicking the loudly snoring panda on the futon next to him, and wondering, not for the first time, how a panda managed to snore in the first place. 


	2. Chapter 1

**Breaking the Monotony  
A Doctor Who/Ranma ½ Crossover  
by Ran-san (Randy McCullick)**

**(Disclaimer)**

Ranma, Akane, and the rest of the Nerima crew are the intellectual property of Rumiko Takahashi, whose shoes this humble one is unworthy to lick.

The Doctor and the Tardis are the property of the British Broadcasting Company (BBC), and currently under the control of BBC Wales and Russell T. Davies.

This work of fiction takes place a few weeks following the end of Volume 38 of the "Ranma ½" Manga, and in the future of the current "Doctor Who" universe. All events in both the Ranma ½ Manga and anime are considered to have occurred, with the Manga taking priority over the anime where events overlap.

**Chapter One**

Saotome Ranma slouched as he walked home from another day at Furinkan High School. Ever since the battle with Saffron at Jusendo and the aborted wedding attempt, things in Nerima had settled down to a nice, predictable (if not always quiet) routine. A nice, predictable, _boring _routine. No new fiancées showing up (not that he would want any), no more cursed sociopaths coming out of the woodwork…except for the local bunch of usual idiots. Life was exactly the same every day, except for the occasional Ryouga appearance, which was sporadic due to Ryouga's own direction sense. But even when it happened, it was only a minor and brief diversion. Plus, Ryouga had finally seemed to get the hint, and he'd been spending more and more time looking for Akari then looking to kill Ranma.

None of this was particularly important to Ranma at the moment. Instead, Ranma kept glancing at a watch on his wrist, and was counting down in his mind. _5…4…3…2…1…_

"Saotome Ranma, you shall cease your vile sorcerous ways and relinquish the fair Tendo Akane and the beauteous pig-tailed girl to me!"

_**WHAM!**_

KunouTatewaki, age 17, slumped to the ground and into blissful unconsciousness, with the print of Ranma's Chinese shoes etched into his face.

Ranma continued on. _3…2…1…_

"Shampoo will be mine!"

_**BAM!**_

Mousse slammed into the wall next to Ranma, a wall already showing damage from impacts on previous days. Mousse slumped to ground, unconscious. His thick glasses slid off his face, broken.

_That's th' fifth pair this week, _Ranma thought idly as he continued on, then resumed his glancing and counting. _4…3…2…1…_

"Nihao, Ranma! Take Shampoo on date, yes?"

"'Ranma take Shampoo on date,' no." Ranma said gruffly. He didn't bother to stop walking. _7…6…5…4…3…2…1…_

_**GLOMP!**_

"Wo ai ni." Shampoo said, lovingly attaching herself to Ranma's arm.

"Dammit, Shampoo, gettoff. I'm not interested, 'kay?" Ranma tried to pull away from the overly affectionate female. Even as he did so, his mind continued to count down. _2…1…_

He felt Akane's battle aura before he even saw it. "Ranmaaaaa….."

"Akane! This ain't what it looks like…." It sounded halfhearted, even to Ranma. He already knew that what was going to happen next would happen regardless of whatever he could say. _And…action!_

**_"_RANMA NO BAKA!" **_**WHAP!** _

_**SPASH!** _Ranma sailed by mallet power over the bridge rail and into the river. She stood up, soaking wet. _Just in time for…_

"Tendo Akane! Pigtailed Girl! Fly into my arms!"

_**SMACK!**_

Kuno went sailing through the air, with more shoe prints added to his face.

Ranma looked up at Akane. _And, finally…_

"Hmmph!" Akane stalked off.

Ranma glanced down at the waterproof, impact resistant watch she had borrowed from Daisuke for this exact purpose. _3:50…exactly the same as yesterday…and the day before that…and the day before that._

Ranma sighed dejectedly and walked back toward the road. Three days before his seventeenth birthday, and Saotome Ranma's life was in a complete and total rut.

* * *

Kounji Ukyo and her "waitress", Konatsu, looked up as the door to her restaurant opened and Ramna walked in, her eyes downcast. 

"Heya, Ranchan!" Ukyo slapped his usual down: a special deluxe "for my fiancé" okonomiyaki and a cup of hot water.

Ranma didn't even bother to pour the water on herself. Instead, she picked at the okonomiyaki moodily.

Ukyo stared. The average lifespan of food around Ranma was mere seconds. "Something wrong, Ranchan? Do you need another?"

"No, Ucchan." She looked up. "So, Bet'cha could usually about set your clock on me, huh?"

Ukyo looked confused. "What do you mean?"

Ranma sighed. "I mean, you had this okonomiyaki timed to th' second I'd show up, _and_ you knew I'd need hot water before I got here! Am I REALLY _that _predictable?"

Ukyo shrugged. "Well, you have been pretty regular these days, Ranchan."

Ranma grimaced, and picked at her food more.

Ukyo eyed her currently red-headed fiancé suspiciously. "Are you _sure_ there's nothing wrong with that okonomiyaki, Ranchan?"

"I guess I'm not really that hungry, Ucchan."

Ukyo's jaw hit the floor. _Ranma not hungry?? _A wall supporting the sane, rational part of Ukyo's mind abruptly collapsed. _Isn't that like day not following night?_

Konatsu piped up hostilely. "If you weren't hungry, why did you come in?" Ukyo glared at him.

Ranma failed to notice. She shrugged. "Force'a habit, I guess."

Ukyo just stared, like she expected Ranma to grow wings and fly away.

Ranma stood up. "I think I need to walk around and think on this for awhile. See you later, Ucchan."

She left, without either finishing the okonomiyaki, or using the hot water.

Ukyo's eyes continued to stare where she left, a look of extreme worry speading on her face. "Ranchan". It was a while before she could think properly again.

* * *

It was awhile before Ranma came back to the Tendo Dojo. She had wandered up and down a few of the streets in Nerima, just thinking. Finally, she arrived home and walked through the gate and into the house. "_Tadaima_," she greeted unenthusiastically. 

"_Okaeri nasai_", he heard Kasumi say from elsewhere in the house.

"Saotome, you cheated!"

"Paho."

Ranma sighed. Not much changes here. She started up the stairs towards the room she shared with her father.

"Ranma!"

Ranma glanced down to see Akane standing in the hallway. "Akane, I—"

"I'm sorry about this afternoon, Ranma. I know you weren't doing anything with Shampoo."

Ranma blinked. _Whaa?_

"To make it up to you, I made you a special dinner."

Realization hit. _Ah, it's Thursday. _"Akane, I'm not really hungry tonight."

A wave of pure rage emanating from Akane washed over Ranma. "RANMA! You went to Ukyo's and filled up on okonomiyaki, didn't you."

"I'm just not hungry." Ranma finished climbing the stairs and went into his room.

Akane was visibly shaking. _"Ranma no…"_

_**BRING!**_

Kasumi answered the phone. _"Moshi moshi? _Hmm…just a moment. Akane? You're little friend Ukyo is on the phone. She want's to talk to you."

Akane fumed. "I don't want—"

"She says it's important."

Akane grabbed the phone crossly. "What do _you_ want?"

"Akane, Ranchan was over here earlier. He—"

"I KNEW IT! The pig—"

"Akane, Ranchan didn't even finish two bites of an okonomiyaki."

Akane's battle aura collapsed in on itself as pure shock set in. _Saotome Ranma, the human eating machine, DIDN'T finish food in front of him? Something is not right here._

"Ranchan was really distracted. He was talking about how predictable his life was recently. I'm worried, Akane. Ranchan sounded really depressed."

Akane's eyebrows shot above her forehead to lodge themselves somewhere in the ceiling. "Ranma…depressed?" _With _his _ego? Is that even _possible?

There was a long hesitating pause on the other end of the phone. "Akane, I'm not dumb. I know I'm not the one that can help him right now. Talk to him, Akane…please. I leave this in your hands."

Akane simply stood there a few moments holding the phone. Finally she nodded, "_Un_! I'll give it a shot."

"_Ooki ni_, Akane." The line went dead.

Akane hung up. _I know how hard saying that was for you, Ukyo. You must really be worried._

* * *

Akane found Ranma in his usual thinking spot on the roof, watching the sun set. However, it was obvious by the glum expression on her face that she wasn't actually _seeing _the sun set, but merely had her eyes looking in that direction. _Kami-sama, he really _does_ look depressed._

She paused for a moment, and decided tact would be the best approach. "Ranma…"

Ranma's eyes shifted to Akane, as if seeing her for the first time. The blank look on her face never fully lifted. "'Kane. Sorry 'bout missin' dinner."

It must have been the dead look Ranma was giving her, but for whatever reason, Akane for once decided to use tact. "That's all right, Ranma. Is there anything I can do? What's wrong?"

A dozen or so retorts flashed through Ranma's mind. However, for once Ranma didn't feel like using them. He'd said them all before, anyway. And they all got the same response. And she really didn't feel like invoking that response right now.

Instead, she sighed. "'Kane, do you realize you've tried t' make me eat your cooking every Thursday for two months?"

Anger flared up. "Ranma, you –"

Ranma shook her head quickly. "That's not what I mean, 'Kane. I mean it happens _every Thursday. _When you said you'd made dinner for me, I knew automatically that it was Thursday. Not Wednesday, or Friday, but Thursday. Just like I knew _to the second _when Kuno was gonna attack me this afternoon."

Akane's battle aura faded. Slightly. "So what? You're a martial artist, Ranma. Reading people is what you're trained to—"

"I wasn't reading my opponents aura or actions, Akane." She held up her arm, showing her borrowed watch. "I was using this."

A look of shock appeared on Akane's face as she realized what Ranma was saying, "You mean…"

"I mean we've all fallen in a rut. You, me, Kuno, Mousse, Shampoo, and Ukyou. All of us."

"Surely it's not THAT bad, Ranma."

Ranma reached into her shirt and pulled out a piece of paper. "Here."

Akane looked at the paper.

**SAOTOME RANMA  
INVOLUNTARY WEEKDAY SCHEDULE**

7:00 am – sparring with Pop.  
7:25 am – Dry clothes and hot water  
7:30 am – Martial Arts Breakfast vs. Pop  
7:40 – Put foot in mouth.  
7:41 – malleted into koi pond. Pop eats rest of my breakfast.  
7:42 – More hot water.  
7:50 – Head to school _late, _run whole way.

8:15 – barely beat clock into school.  
8:30-11:45 – Avoid getting 'Happo 5-yen setsu'ed by Ms. Hinako  
12:00 –Lunch.  
12:30-3:30 –Principal Kuno. Avoid:  
a)Kow-towing to him  
b)Having my pigtail removed  
c)Having my school grade destroyed  
2:30- Gym if Principal Kunou is defeated by then. If not, stopping principal Kuno will be considered Gym.

3:45 pm – Attacked by Kuno. Kick Kuno into ground.  
3:47 pm – Attacked by Mousse. Roundhouse into wall.  
3:49 pm –'Ranma go on date with Shampoo, yes?'  
3:49:10 pm –Shampoo glomp attack.  
3:49:20 pm –Akane sees Shampoo latched onto me.  
3:49:25 pm –Akane Mallets me over bridge into river.  
3:49:27 pm –Kuno 'pig tailed girl' molest attack. Response: kick him into low orbit.  
3:49:30 pm –Akane stalks off angrily.

4:10 pm – Ucchans. Saotome Special: Deluxe okonomiyaki (all you can eat) and cup of hot water.  
5:30 pm – Return home.  
6:30 pm – Dinner. Largely same as breakfast. _Note: Thursdays Akane will attempt to cook dinner. This will result in  
a) getting smacked into the koi pond for saying how bad her cooking is, or  
b)A trip to Dr. Tofus.  
_8:00pm – Bath.  
9:00pm—Night Stretches.  
9:30pm—Bed.

Ranma looked up at her, and took the paper back. "I wrote that on Sunday. It's been absolutely accurate all week. I've been trying to break the pattern all week, without any serious success, until I came up here tonight without eating. And look at all th' trouble THAT caused."

"Yeah, people are noticing that you're a bit out of it. Ukyo called and was really concerned."

"I'm BORED, Akane. Sure, I can break this routine, but it takes a LOT of effort. And all it'll do it settle us into a new routine once the others adjust. I always get attacked by Kuno and Mousse and glomped by Shampoo and nothin' I can do seems to stop them. I'm so _sick_ of the 'same ol', same ol''.

"Well, your birthday's on Saturday. That should be a change." Akane knew that Kasumi had been planning the party since last week."

Ranma snorted. "As if I didn't know what was already going to happen." She said glumly. "It'll be Christmas all over again. You'll want to give me your present (_something you made yourself, I suspect) _at the perfect moment, but th' others won't let you. Shampoo and Ucchan'll use it as an excuse t' try to get me to choose them. Kodachi'll crash and attempt to para-seduce me. Shampoo'll prob'ly use some ancient Amazon wrappin' paper or somethin' to snare me. Mousse'll interfere…by attackin' me, and Kuno'll show up because Nabiki sold him the information that it's the 'pig-tailed girl's' birthday. In the end, I'll have a miserable day, and we'll need t' call the repair people again. _Absolutely predictable._"

* * *

Across town at the Nekohatten, Cologne was handing a parcel to her great-granddaughter. "Here you go, child. Special product from China. Magical wrapping paper of binding. Guanteed to tie up the person that opens the package it's wrapped in. 

"Ayia! Much thanks, great-grandmother."

* * *

Akane paused. In her mind, she could see all of this happening. She _did _have a sweater she made for him. Still, she tried to keep a cheery look. "Come on, Ranma. What are you, a prophet?" 

"You don't have t'be no prophet, Akane. You just have t'know the mindsets of the people you're dealing with."

"What about a training trip, then?"

"They all end the same way, too. I run into Ryoga, we fight, destroying all my camping gear, 'til we fall in a river or it starts raining. Then I pack up what's left and head home. Oh, and I usually run into P-Chan on th' way home. It's like doin' th' same kata, just at a different pace."

Akane stopped. That did describe the last three training trips Ranma had made. She remembered Ranma showing up sopping wet, female, and carrying an unconscious P-Chan under an arm.

Ranma continued. "Remember Kirin? Toma? Herb? Saffron? The Orochi? When was th' last time we had somethin' new happen?"

"Ranma. Have you forgotten most of those people wanted to KIDNAP, KILL AND/OR MARRY ME?!?"

"No, I haven't. And t' be honest, I _don't_ miss that. But going off and having t' face them and not knowin' what was gonna to happen…" Ranma paused, "…was kinda fun." She paused. "I'm not _challenged_ anymore, Akane. Since Jusendo, I'm in a league of my own. Th' only one with close abilities is Ryoga, and he isn't _that_ much of a challenge. Mousse and Kuno are 'one hit' wonders. And with th' challenge gone, all that's left is th' monotony and th' stupidity. And it's startin' t' drive me insane. If I can't find some way t' find a path that doesn't go down the same road, I'm afraid I'll have a nervous breakdown or burn out. T' be honest, I'm surprised I haven't already."

Akane's eyes went wide. While Ranma had been more open with his feelings ever since Jusendo, this was more than he had ever admitted.

Ranma looked at her. "Akane, I'm turnin' Seventeen on Sunday. How long is this going to keep up? Are we going t' be looking at my _Seventieth_ birthday with nothing going on but the same thing we're doing now?"

"You've been thinking about this a lot, Ranma. It's…not like you."

"I've had plenty of time t' think. Before, when I got here, things always moved so fast, I never had time t' reflect on things. I mean, first the engagement, then Kuno, then Ryoga, then Shampoo and so on. It never let up. I never had time to think about things. Now, it's all I really have to do."

"So, what do you do about it?"

"I dunno. I feel trapped." Ranma looked back at the sun. _I'll do anything to break this monotony. But everything I can think of doesn't help the problem. Unless… _Ranma sat up. "Akane, I got it! Let's go get married."

Akane's eyes bulged out of her head, her heart skipped a beat, her stomach flip-flopped, and her blood froze. "_WHAT! _Now?_"_

"Yeah, now. It's not like I _want _to, but it's all I can think of. Let's elope. We'll gather our stuff and catch a train t' Yokohama or Osaka or someplace where we won't be found. Then we go t' an official in the mornin' and get our marriage certificate. Then we come back on Sunday and show it off to everyone. Ukyo will give up there, Shampoo will probably go back to China in disgrace along with Mousse, and Kuno will get the picture eventually. Boom! Good-bye monotony! Not like it's new adventure, but at least it ends th' repetition."

"You want me to marry you because you're _BORED_?"

Ranma seemed oblivious to the sudden flare of angry aura near her. She had frowned, thinking of something. "Oh, wait. One snag. Nabiki will find out and tip off th' others t' where we're going and BOOM, it's th' wedding all over again. I swear, she's got th' whole house bugged or somethin'."

"…AND YOU ASKED ME AS A _GIRL?!? RANMA NO BAKA!" _

_**SMACK!**_

Akane stalked off, tears streaming. "_Bakabakabakabakabakabakabakabaka……"_

Ranma rubbed her face. She had been so obsessed with her personal ennui that she had quite forgotten she hadn't changed back. Briefly, she considered going after Akane, but that would just make things worse. _Well, guess I should take a bath._

Ranma stood up, crumpled the paper and started towards the bath, but then paused, listening. She wasn't sure, but she swore she could hear a faint, bizarre, wheezing, groaning sound coming from the direction of the river. However, before she could tell for sure, she was smacked from behind.

"Ranma! You disgrace me by mistreating your fiancée like that, b—glomph."

Ranma walked past her father, Saotome Genma, who was now rapidly trying to dislodge the ball of paper that just got stuffed down his throat.

* * *

In her room, Tendo Nabiki popped the earbud out of her ear and hid the small transceiver under her bed, cursing under her breath. _Damn, he knows!_ Quickly, she went to mop up the water she had spat out a minute ago.

* * *

_"Akane, let's go get married."_

_She was back on the roof. Ranma was a guy this time, and was standing, looking at the sunset. "Ranma. Why?"_

_Ranma turned to look at her. "Because I love you, Akane. I've finally decided. If I'm going to spend the rest of my life with anyone, I want it to be you._

_Ranma smiled a shy smile and held out his hand._

Akane's mental vision blurred as a new wave of tears started. _Ranma, why couldn't you ask me like _thatShe sniffed some more. _"Baka…"_

Still sniffling, she watched as a shooting star lit up the night sky.

* * *

"Stroke! Stroke! Stroke! Stroke!" 

Kuno Tatewaki continued his practice against a dummy equipped with a black pigtail. "Soon, Saotome, I'll have mastered this technique, and the fair Tendo Akane and the pig-tailed girl will be MINE!"

Engrossed in his vision of life with Akane and the Pig-Tailed girl, Kuno failed to notice the shadow looming up behind him.

A few minutes later, Sarugakure Sasuke, faithful retainer to the Kuno family entered the training room. "Master Tatewaki, are you ready for your nightly cookie and bedtime sto-?"

The training room was empty, except in the middle of the room where Kuno's robe and bokken lay on the floor.


End file.
